So, here it all begins. With one single blog post. The idea was so simple. Eat healthier, exercise more. So what is stopping me? Nothing. Just my plain-assed unwillingness to change. I have done it all before. I lost 20 kgs and damn i looked fine. But eating healthy gets to be a drag and I missed my lover, chocolate. So on piles the pounds, I get diagnosed with depression and I just don't see the point in doing it. Nothing will change, I still be the same loopy person on the inside, I will just be 20 kgs lighter. So in reality, I am scared to put this in motion again. The amount of compliments I got being smaller than I am was scary. I am not used to that. I am used to blending into the background, out of sight, out of mind. But I am sick of being the size I am. I want to look better, and feel better. I believe that I will be less vunerable to depression if I change my size and mindset. So here goes.